Wednesday, July 11, 2012

truths & faqs

It's so easy to fall in love with pretty girls, good-looking guys, and talented people on the Internet with their perfect hair, perfect make-up, perfect outfits, perfect photos, perfect jobs, a.k.a perfect lives, basically. You can't help but wish they were your friend or to actually be in their shoes for at least a day. I, myself, have a list of people that I secretly fan girl over regularly. I once dreamt that five of my online girl crushes threw me a surprise birthday party. (Aaaaahhh!!!)

But let's get real here for a second. From what I notice, probably about 90% of things we post on our blogs? Pointless and shallow pieces of information that are only a small part of the tip of the iceberg. They're just a hodgepodge of messy ramblings and unnecessary material that barely say anything about who we are as persons. What makes her laugh to tears? What are his worst fears? Why is she sad, and what cheers her up?

Can I honestly say that I've been 100% truthful and completely myself on my own blog? Hell no. I wouldn't want to bore anybody with my whole birth to present life story, and I certainly wouldn't want to scare them off with my crazy bitch alter ego. Plus, my hair looks absolutely terrible without any product on! There are things that I like and should keep to myself. Although I try to be as candid and as natural as I can, I still choose my words and plan what to put here carefully and thoughtfully. In fact, I have to type everything up on Word before I go on Blogger, and then it takes me forever to click "publish post" because I read and reread and constantly edit. At times, I shamefully end with this thought: "Will people still like me after this post?"

Anything can be sensationalized and blown out of proportion. Half, if not most, of what you see online have been "enhanced" in one way or another simply to please. Because, well, no matter how many times we say bullshit about how "I'm doing this for myself" or "it's for self-expression", we have to admit that the followers -- the "fans" -- they do help drive, motivate, and inspire us. They keep us going.

Which brings me to this: what ever happened to the spirit of interaction and community in blogging? Have we taken the time to really get to know the person behind a blog? The person behind a comment? Do we even care? And so, I'd like to propose this: leave a comment/tweet/e-mail/FB message/whatever-except-stalk a blogger or a reader and ask them something (anything, as long as it isn't out of line!) you've always wondered about them. Preferably something outside of their normal blog topics. If you're approaching a fashion blogger, ask about their most embarrassing, ugliest experience. If a food blogger, ask about their childhood. Be random and creative. I think the opportunity of getting to know more about another human being and reading a tiny bit of their story, even if they're miles away and a total stranger, is the best thing about the world of blogging.

Of course, I'd love to know more about you, dear reader/fellow blogger! So, tell me this: "Who or what were you in your past life?" I've always thought of myself as either an ancient Egyptian princess or a housewife in the 50's. What about you? :)

Also, if you'd like to leave a question or two for me to answer, they're very much welcome, too. Maybe I'll answer them in a video next time!


  1. Amen to this, Gela! I have had the same sentiments. I just don't know when to actually get personal on my blog, for the fear of sharing too much information about myself of boring my readers about, well, information about myself. Do you think we can go full-on 100% with self expression on our blogs?

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  3. Hi, I'm not yet bold enough to leave you a question but I appreciate your blog more because of what you said that you think/type in word/reread-edit-revise your posts before publishing it. I follow blogs that are, at times, spam posting, I have nothing against those tho. Those are still their blogs after all. It's just that it's easier to appreciate bloggers who care about their readers (at least for their time, that is)

    This is the 2nd time that I hit submit, HAHAHA so I deleted the other one.

  4. I've learned that being too personal on blogs can have it's disadvantages. People start judging and think they know the real you. And I've had my wave of haters in my earlier blogging days. haha

    Which is why I limit (and edit) my blog posts to my interests such as food/travel and photography - but still show my personality on each post :)

    And yes, I've always loved the bogging community, i've gotten to know people from across the globe because of blogging! :)

    P.S. I was definitely a hippie. Too much love and peace flowing in my blood! haha

  5. "What ever happened to the spirit of interaction and community in blogging?"

    Great question Gela. Unlike in the past, bloggers who don't know each other really interact online. Recently, bloggers only interact among their circle, who's friends with who, who goes to event more often and so on so forth.

    Not everyone's as interactive these days because a lot have also been focusing on their blogs. For some time, I haven't had the time to surf anymore because I went to so many events, got so many products so I just have to flush out a lot of entries without me really reading others' blogs.

    Tabitha's right, when you post personal blogs, it can backfire since people can judge you, feeling they know you enough. I agree with you as well when you said there are certain things we like and should keep to ourselves.

    In my case, no matter how boring it can be at times, I like to throw in a couple of personal entries and "honesty" posts because these reveal what makes me human. It shows people that I experience emotions, and that my situations aren't as different from theirs. Through these posts, I started receiving quality comments exchanging personal e-mails/messages from people who can relate and would like to share but didn't want to make it public.

    One of my most successful personal entries, "Because I'm Human" have made me feel that this is the best direction because blogging this way made me more connected to the people who are actually reading my blog. :)

    Yes readers help motivate us and I know a few bloggers who feel like quitting blogging because no one seems to be reading them and their hits aren't doing any better. And it's sad that other people feel the need to be validated in this community. It can't be helped, it's not bad to look for approval from other people but it's detrimental when it's one's main purpose of doing something. :)

    Speaking of questions:
    How do you think your elementary classmates remember you?

    Keep on being great Gela! And post a tutorial on how you make your hair awesome or your takes on different looks for that short hair! :)

  6. agree! sometimes that's the reason why i don't frequent the blogs of big players in the blogging community.. because i find that they don't quite interact well with commenters (SAD, but true) and snobbish. blogging to me kasi should be interactive and not just passive.

    anyway, i don't know what i am in my past life.. but i wish i lived a good and fulfilled life back then :)

  7. Who or what were you in your past life?

    i always believe i was a geisha in my past life... and a flower child slash surferbabe thereafter. hehe


  8. In my past like you're my baby girl. I am your mom. And there's nothing you can do about it because it is my past life "fantasy". deal with it.


    gee... my blog personality is better than me.

  9. Wow this is such a great post. Very real, truthful and nothing superficial. I agree to whatever you've said and I also second Tabitha and Melai.
    I don't get the time to blog everyday or every alternative days. I'm very serious about my work which gives me little time to blog (once in two weeks). But what I write or post is what I feel and I don't try to impersonate somebody else just to impress my readers. And I completely get it when you write: "Will people still like me after this post?"
    Once in a while I try and write something for my readers to know me better which I save for special posts and special days for me and when I do, I'm truthful and try to stay as humble as possible and not tweak reality.
    And about interacting, there are so many bloggers who don't respond or reply to comments or questions which is disheartening.
    Coming back to your question. Since I'm a Buddhist, we can have our present and past life calculated from which I got to know that I was a young Prince. A prince not a King so I'm guessing I died or something before I got to be a King, haha.

    my question(s) to you: How do you feel when you see other bloggers who have more followers and comments than yours but their blogs aren't up to the standard? =P
    and how much time do you spend looking at other blogs and who clicks your photos?
    look forward to the video.

  10. To be honest my hair looks like crap without product too :D So I cut it A LOT! I pretty much agree on everything you said, blogging has turned into comments like this: "love your blog, following you, follow me if you like". I've been putting up long posts, with lots of text, and nobody takes the time to read it, they just scroll down to the photos. There are few people who are actually interested in what I have to say. And really, I prefer to have lesser reader who actually enjoy my writings than millions who just don't get me -_-